It's hard for me to decide where to start this post and what exactly to do with it. This week I had two multi-tiered cakes due that both needed to be decorated to perfection while still maintaining my high standards for taste (ha! how's that for high class food jargon!). I've always struggled with timing when bake, so this week I made an exact schedule that I was to follow to the minute if I was going to finish these cakes, go to work, and maintain some semblance of sanity. A very loose semblance of sanity.
But like anything, there were many phases that I went through to complete these two cakes on time and without throwing any sharp objects.
Phase One: Excitement
It was at this (misguided) first phase where I decided it would be a good idea to go for a three teir cake and a two teir cake. Lasting approximately 3 days, I made over two dozen fondant roses and rose buds in various creamy pastel colours while watching BBC dramas on the tv. After taking out every baking book I owned, I settled for a "simple" sponge cake that I could put together and freeze no problem. I would also whip up a marscapone cream in lieu of a buttercream for the three teir cake for something different to try. I wanted this cake in particular to impress. I looked at countless photos of wedding cakes and youtube videos of making wedding cakes for inspiration and nailed the ability to effortlessly draw out a 3D picture of a teired cake with any number of designs on it. Pages and pages of designs.
Phase Two: Apprehension
The thing about looking at countless pictures of wedding cakes online, is that after a while they all begin to look exactly the same. The colours, the flowers, the general themes... it's as though all these cakes were taken out of the same book. However, with a generic cake look, comes an inherent expectation for that exact look. An expectation I was begining to believe would be very very difficult to meet. It was during this phase where I began to try scheduling myself to the minute. It was also here where I keenly chewed off each and every one of my carefully manicured fingernails. Delicious.
Phase Three: Calm
The thing about phases is that there is always one stuck in there that surprises you. In one single day I set out to (calmly) do everything on the schedule with no excuses or complaints. This meant that in that one single day I made 4 cakes, a lemon curd, lemon syrup, raspberry syrup, marscapone cream, and honey buttercream. That's right. Honey buttercream. And yes, it was as spring delicious as it sounds. Unsurprisingly, this was the least stressful part of the whole ordeal. I got to be creative and play with food the way I always have. It came naturally and I was able to dance through the kitchen listening to The Clash and Adam Ant without any worries at all. It was going to taste good (it was going to taste freaking delicious actually) and really, to me, that's all that has ever mattered.
Phase Four: Terror
The two teir cake was the project cake for the final class of my cake decorating course. As part of the criteria, I had to get as far as rolling the fondant onto the cake before the class. Everything else would added at the actual class itself. First off, let me say that fondant is the stupidest concept ever. You don't actually eat it, and putting it over a cake is most likely the reason I will die of a heart attack or stroke at 30. Forget high cholesterol--fondant is where my issues lie. That's not the terrifying part though. Oh no, that's only stressful. The Terrifying part is the part where I have to drive to the class with this cake place precariously on my lap. If it fell due to a sudden stop or turn I think I might have actually got out of the car and punched someone in the face. Little bit high strung at this point, needless to say.
Phase Five: Acute Panic
Cake number 2, the three teired cake that was commissioned, is covered in fondant, has some admittedly adorable ribbon wrapped around it, and a nicely piped string of pearls. AND IS SAGGING LIKE THE PARTS ON AN OLD PERSON!!! People ask whether it's themed as the leaning Tower of Pisa (so clever) and I am very concerned that the whole thing will topple over before I even get a chance to pipe on my carefully planned decoration. Is the cake inside alright? Has it turned into some kind of mouldy mush?? When I deliver it to my unwitting (possibly unwilling) partons, will they cut it open to find something green and hairy living inside?? All I want to do is peel back the blue fondant and check...
Phase Six: Sweet Relief (see also, pride or euphoria)
It's over. The whole ordeal has finally come to an end and I can see the cakes for what they are. They really are quite pretty. I don't think I've ever made anything that looked quite so beautiful before. It's almost a shame that they'll have to be cut into and devoured. They look like they're worth the time and effort (and maybe even the tears). I have to say that even the actual decorating part was exciting to the point where I didn't want to stop. Didn't expect that one!
When everything is all said and done, I think I learned more from making these two cakes these weeks than I could have learned reading any one of my many many books or online. I know that the next one will be easier only because there are so many things I would do just a little bit differently. I'm just going to keep my fingers crossed that the cake inside isn't actually green and hairy...
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